Gratitude – an Interlude

The definition of Interlude according to Merriam Webster is “an intervening or interruptive period, space, or event”. Today I fought a free day of rest with anxious thoughts that I was wasting my time no matter how I spent it. Ever been there? 🙂

This time last year I learned what self-soothing was, which, if you were also unaware of it in practice means this: “the action of a young child ceasing to cry without being comforted by a parent or caregiver, in particular when left to fall asleep on their own.” But, we do this as adults too, and if you never really learned how on your own as a child, that has likely carried over to adulthood. There’s more to be said there, but I’ll leave it at that before I go on a rant here!!

A form of self-soothing I learned helped me (as I tried to break the habit of napping to escape or watching netflix) is going on a drive, throwing on my Happy Vibes playlist and telling God everything I’m thankful for and remembering He has orchestrated all of it. It’s easy for me to forget that.

“A Psalm for giving thanks. Make a joyful noise to the Lord, all the earth! Serve the Lord with gladness! Come into his presence with singing! Know that the Lord, he is God! It is he who made us, and we are his; we are his people, and the sheep of his pasture. Enter his gates with thanksgiving, and his courts with praise! Give thanks to him; bless his name! For the Lord is good; his steadfast love endures forever, and his faithfulness to all generations.”

Psalm 100:1-5

I don’t plan on proof reading this blog or making it lean any which direction, I just want to share, if I’m being completely honest. 

Specifically, I wanted to share a note I had in my phone that I kept intermittent record of from January 2020 – September 2020, a time that was easy to miss the moments of thankfulness if you weren’t careful. All of these little recordings were just snippets of the big things being done, but I hope reading this will encourage you to “be faithful in little” and know that God will work everything towards good if you have an open heart to give and receive love:

January 2020:

• L.A.: Having a layover in Ari’s hometown, thankful that with the flu I got to rest in a warm bed and meet her friends and family. She also bought me dinner.
• New Zealand Airport: Tito and Jenn bought me a burrito and kombucha and sat and shared with me
• Coff’s Harbor, Australia: burning dinner because we got to leave and run to the grocery store and have a ridiculous amount of fun doing it
• CH, Australia: Playing piano in the Wesleyan church, Linds and MG coming to join out of nowhere
• Nelson’s Bay, Australia: Sleeping in a hammock under the stars, listening to the beating of bat wings underneath Jenn’s hammock
• NB, Australia: Hearing testimonies. MOVING testimonies from youth group at the summer camp. Them giving one another prophetic words. Getting to learn how to cook for all 80 of them.
• NB, Australia: getting left behind at the beach.
• CH, Australia: Troy. His vulnerability to come before a group of 20 year olds and seek prayer for hard things we know nothing about, but our heavenly Father does.
• CH: Late night beach run with Brent and Jared looking at the stars.
• CH: Talking with Lauren about Jared. Talking with Jared about Lauren (Edit: they’re MARRIED now!)
• CH: The morning runs with Ryan and Jenn, exploring. Especially the naked man on the beach we found. Naturally.
• CH: The ballpit fight.
• CH: the worship session where Brent wanted to sing without music
• CH: Seeing how moved everyone was when they had their first big God encounters on the field. Don’t forget this feeling Al.
• CH: Praying over Brandon as a leadership team. Moving. This is what the body looks like in times of support. Thank you Jesus. 
• CH: the candlelight dinner night. The worship. Joking with Jared, Lauren, Zach and Tito.
• Gold Coast: Meeting the Japanese man in the bus station after returning vans.
• Aussie Airport: Jerome forcing me to take his sleeping pad so I could rest.

February 2020:

• Bali, Indonesia: Becca bought me juice without asking, and then we got to have juice together.
• Bali: Brent and I bumming around at Bali Buda.
• Bali: Exchanging testimonies with Linds. What a beautiful day.
• Bali: Getting stuck in a taxi and missing dinner with Em, Emily and Claire: boy talk, traffic, pure laughter and the GHOST WITH THE BOOTY GIF.
• Bali: Linds came up and rubbed my feet in the pool without a second thought of if they were clean or not.
• Bali: Butterflies, Ari and I spotting them everywhere.
• Bali: Kathy moving my hair off the back of my neck unexpectedly during a session.
• Bali: Running in the POURING rain with our clothes on and jumping in the pool. Liberating.
• Bali: Waving and smiling at the girl in the uniform, with an ever bigger smile returned on the way to the waterfall.
• Bali: Tay’s mermaid nailpolish.
• Bali: Em’s poems
• Bali: breakfast with Linds, MG and Shea
• Bali: the yellow dress.
• Bali: Coffee with Brent and Tito
• Bali: Late night chats with Andrea. Always.
• Bali: dinner with Becca and Jenn
• En route to Lombok: the little boy with batman pants on the ferry
• Lombok: Pilates with Jenn. Breakfast with Becca. Banana pancakes.
• Lombok: Playing music on Jerome’s day with the surf shop owners impromptu.
• Kampung Inggris: literally everything about this place. Except for the moldy rooms.
• Jakarta: Getting in the wrong taxi that made us late to debrief, but was honestly beautiful to drive through the local markets and see a different part of Indo.
• Intense desire to actually seek the heart of Jesus.

March 2020:

• India: The girls giving me flowers and a journal when bad news broke to me. Seeing Brandon in the hallway after as well, sharing the compassion of the Father.
• India: Hot seat with all of BP 🙂
• India: The fog that took 4 hours to roll away at the Taj Mahal.
• India: watching the boys cram onto one bench in a heart shaped dining table.
• India: Redbull-mango lassie 🙂

April – June

• LA: Ari’s mom taking us in.
• LA: Ari’s mom and Omar watching Inuyasha with us.
• LA: The countless zoom calls, worship sessions and time spent with Ari.
• LA: The blue butterfly. OMG.
• LA: the runs, the walks, the phone calls. Everything. Wow.
• LA: my birthday. Wow. Getting to dress up, eat, Ari being the kindest ever.
• LA: meeting up with Kati and Aspen and laughing and crying to no end. And drinking 4 kombuchas.
• Portland: getting to see Jenn and having a day where we hiked, adventured and talked about everything imaginable. Also, salmon berries?
• Wrangell, Alaska: The weird prison cell room starting to become restful. Our little porch was lovely.
• Wrangell: Dancing with God in private and soulfully during quarantine to Chris Renzema.
• Wrangell: Dylan buying us groceries and sneaking up to make sure we were all alive.
• Wrangell: Raymond and Gerald talking to me about all the things as we starved hahaha
• Wrangell: Gerald asking me to pray over him
• Wrangell: Raymond saying he wanted tattoos on his knuckles removed that read: Low life
• Wrangell: Dylan and Anna bringing by homemade apple pie OMG
• Wrangell: Haley bringing art supplies and coffee and chatting with me to keep me alive
• Wrangell: Thomas grilling on the outside of a fan over a trashcan hahahaha
• Wrangell: Rick buying me a red bull
• Wrangell: Randy always saying good morning to me in the office
• Wrangell: Meeting all of the gang awkwardly with a halibut and rice dish and staring at them from afar. P.S. all funny. 
• Wrangell: Katelyn feeling led to put me up. Are you kidding?!

July – September 2020

• Wrangell: Getting to see Anna and Dylan up at work all the time. IS this even a job?!
• Wrangell: conversations with the dock crew. Incredible.
• Wrangell: The gang welcoming me late at night with popcorn, pie and hot chocolate after working 18 hours. What a blessing!!!
• Wrangell: finally having a couple hours off and Katelyn getting me up into the mountains and driving up the road.
• Wrangell: sneaking out of the office with Anna to get coffee.
• Wrangell: July 4th BABY EYES and 5k and hike and Shrimping boat excursion with Mike
• Wrangell: napping in the F&G work truck trying to hide
• Wrangell: Coffee breaks that take the place of smoke breaks for me hahahaha
• Wrangell: midday steal aways to the bank to chat with Haley.
• Wrangell: FINALLY A GAME NIGHT I MADE!
• Wrangell: Rippin on the Zodiac as a quarantine method hahahaha
• Wrangell: The pump house bible chat
• Wrangell: getting leftover halibut nuggets and corn brought to me at work because I was SO BUSY.
• Getting FLOWN to Seward?! CMON!!!!
• Seward, Alaska: Brian, a man I don’t even know, buying me starbucks my first day at their job.
• Seward, Alaska: the drive to Anchorage with Jocelyn
• Seward: cleaning out the apartment for the plant, finding the prayer from the previous tenant.
• Seward: missing Wrangell and the people there.
• Wrangell: first grocery trip back after Seward and genuinely missing the island.

There’s nothing big there. It may have no meaning to you reading it but I am filled to the brim with understanding that I am so very blessed. Tammy Moye once told me a quote she had heard about God being a God of the ordinary. But it’s sharing the ordinary moments with one another that brings the Joy of the Lord to our hearts and and memories. I wonder what my list would look like if I wrote down more than just the gratitude I observed in my own life and the selfishness of just what I received, but how I saw Him move in my people as well. I encourage you to make your own list to look back on. Stack your Ebenezer stones high and tight!!!! I’m starting my new list today in hopes to share with you guys come June. 

Thanks for reading 🙂 I’d love to hear some of your gratitudes in the comments!!